When people decide to become parents, they often have no idea what problems they may face, how to solve them. Mistakes in raising children are common among both young and experienced moms and dads. Each child is individual and unique, therefore there are no universal methods, they must be selected depending on the situation, character traits and temperament of the child.
Common Mistakes in Parenting
There are no perfect parents, no matter how hard they try. Let’s look at the typical mistakes parents make in raising children.
1. Hyper-custody – hypo-custody.
Hyper-guardianship is an excessive guardianship of children, which is expressed in the desire of parents to surround the baby with increased attention, to protect him even in the absence of danger, to read him https://argoprep.com/blog/building-professional-learning-communities/ every day.
Hypo-custody is a style of parenting in which the child is left to himself with a lack of attention from mom and dad. Both styles affect the mental development of a person in different ways depending on age.
This style is characterized by the fact that the parent perceives the baby as bad and unsuitable for life, feels anger, annoyance and irritation towards him. For example, the mistakes of parents in the upbringing of adolescents are manifested in the absence of freedom, to which they aspire, in the rejection of their independence, the rejection of their characteristics.
With this style of parenting, the mother or father practically “dissolves” in the problems of the child. As a result, both children and parents do not feel like full-fledged individuals outside of relationships with each other.
4. Infantilization of the child.
Educational errors here are manifested in the parental desire to infantilize the baby, to ascribe to him personal and social failure. Parents see him as unsuccessful and subject to bad influences, and in order to protect him from them, they decide everything for him.
Limitation of personal freedom and independence in decision-making are mistakes in the upbringing of a teenager. In the future, he will protest against the rules set by his parents.
5. Lack of time for communication.
Here, parents’ mistakes in education are manifested in the fact that parents try to be in time everywhere – to make a career, fulfill household duties and raise children in between.
If mom or dad is constantly busy and does not pay attention to the baby, then he closes in on himself. It is important to remember that children need parents to set their priorities right and give them time.
6. Lack of rules and boundaries.
If a child considers himself the head of the family, then mom and dad made a mistake in education. Some parents do not know how to set rules and boundaries, to help children abide by them. The child feels that his needs are the most important in the family, and he achieves his goal, despite the prohibitions.
Mom scolds her son for low grades at school, but when he corrects them and read https://argoprep.com/blog/restorative-justice-in-schools/, she does not notice it. This is also a common mistake of family education, the so-called “depreciation”. Often this happens because parents take children’s achievements for granted, do not consider it necessary to praise or thank the child.
8. Emotional rejection.
Children are open to new experiences, they are interested in learning about the world around them. The mistakes of parenting here are manifested in the inability to show their own emotions and respond to the feelings of the child.
In such families, children do not always know what emotions they experience and how to deal with them correctly.
9. Bad role model.
Children copy what they see – emotions, behavior. If a parent wants a child to grow up to be happy, loving and caring, he must be a role model.
For example, adults forbid their son to play the console, but they themselves play it. There is a “double standard” – they can, but I can not. In this case, the child will also try to break the rules and obligations at the opportunity.
10. Physical and psychological abuse.
Unfortunately, some parents find that bullying helps. But this can only lead to the fact that children will begin to be afraid of them, become distrustful, anxious, withdrawn and, possibly, with a traumatized psyche.