In order for the child to grow up independently, parents should remember a few rules

1. Create a safe and nurturing environment at home with
It is important that the child feels confident in his home, so that he does not hear numerous “no”s. Even the smallest kid in the house should have his own place, and his own things, which he can dispose of at his own discretion. In the kitchen, in the bathroom, in the room, there should be items available to the child, especially at those moments when he shows a desire to take part in household chores.

2. Show your child how to perform certain actions and involve him in the process.
Only an adult can teach a child to do or not to do something. Let the child participate in cleaning the house, cooking, gardening, constantly ask the child to help you, and share the work with him. Anna Bykova advises to create a safe space for independent actions of the baby and not to insist on her vision of the process. Otherwise, the momentum to action may be lost.

3. Be patient and give your child as much time as he needs.
Of course, children, due to their age and physical development, can spend much more time on the simplest thing than an adult. And more than once, you will probably catch yourself thinking that it would be easier and faster to do everything yourself. But after all, your goal is to grow an independent personality, and for this you should be patient. This is exactly the case when the process itself is more important than the end result.

4. Recognize the child’s right to make mistakes and, do not judge or criticize. When a person takes on a new business for himself and makes mistakes, this is normal. Giving the child the right to make a mistake, we protect him from the so-called “excellent student syndrome” (when a mistake is a strong stress that forms fear of a new job, task). And if you do not besiege your little assistant with criticism for mistakes, then he will quickly realize them himself and try to correct them. The best method against errors is only your example.

5. The vanity of parents “kills” the independence of children.

It is far from always necessary for parents to insist on their vision of the process or intentions of the child. If your son says, for example, that music school, playing the piano, and the prospect of becoming a virtuoso pianist are “not for me,” think about it. Perhaps, indeed, the guy “twirls” somersaults on the horizontal bar much better and brings good grades from school in mathematics. Anna Bykova advises mothers to forget about their vanity and panic on the topic “Oh, what will friends and neighbors say?!” Choose what is more important: the formation of an independent person or the satisfaction of your own dreams?

DET8AB An attractive happy young mum picking up or dropping off her son at the infant school gates

6. Let the child go to the “development zone” without fanatical guardianship on your part.

Parental care should be dosed and gradually decrease with the age of the child. A simple example: a teenage son with friends. There is a call from my mother:

– Son, did you eat? .. To meet you from training? ..

In your opinion, how will more independent friends react to such care?.. Psychologist Anna Bykova notes that, first of all, parents are not ready for the independence of a child. They must first analyze the causes of their anxieties. And little by little let the child go to “autonomous swimming”. But not allowing the other extreme – permissiveness.

Yes, all this takes time and patience, but the independence of the child, his help, courage in learning new things and gratitude will return to you!